6 Of The Best Lessons I Ever Learned

It has been a long time! I must apologize! I have truly missed you. 

I had to take some time out to make sure I was going in the right direction.  From time to time we all have to evaluate things to keep from going too far off a cliff!  I felt like I was running around in circles chasing my tail.  I decided I needed to get clarity. To do that you have to separate yourself.  It is not always easy but so necessary. 

I found out things about myelf that I never knew.  I really started to see things clearer. The confusion was gone. The worry fell off. The anxiety stopped.  When I learned a lesson I felt like, a tank of gas getting filled with Super Premium Gas until the tank was running over. I want to share what I learned, hopefully they will help you, too.

Here's What I learn:

Success is not always pretty. I learned that everyone is not happy about your success.  Like the old saying, "like crabs in a barrel," some always wants to pull you down. Some people want to keep you from being successful. Others want to become successful before you. It is just how it goes. The great thing is there are those people that are happy for your success and will comfort you in failure. Those people are rare. Keep them close.

You are uniquely you.  In the world today, we have learned to change who we are to adapt to our environment.  No one wants to be the first person to be different but if you are going to be true to yourself you have to dare to be different.

Make Things happen. You are responsible for your success. The bottom-line is, not everyone sees your dream.  Everyone does not understand who you are or what qualifies you to handle the task.  Despite, what people may say, It Is Up To You To Make Things Happen! Who's dream is it anyway?

In life there are winners and losers.  The losers always have a million excuses why they are not successful. They always talk about success but never do anything to achieve it.  Winners see opportunity in everything.  They always make a way when it seems impossible.  Which one are you, loser or winner?

Stop giving it up for free? I am talking about help.  I love helping people.  I want everyone to be successful.  Many times I have helped people to my own detriment. Then, I wonder why I am never successful. Duh? Because I you spend all your time helping others more than yourself. I decided I will help but I will put limits and boudaries on my time.  I aslo decided If people need special projects completed they can pay for my time, like we all pay for special services.

Stop doing it all.  Pick what you are truly good at and do that.  Let people know what you bring to the table.  Why not say, "I am can do this, this and this. If, you need me in those areas I can help."  Have the courage to know your own limitations.

I learned alot.  It has made me a better person.  I am not spending my time spinning my wheels on pointless stuff. Nor am I listening to the nay-sayers. I can honestly say I know myself. I am happy.  Truly happy.  Because I took the time to put things into perspective I feel confident, excited, and my passion has been renewed.  I understand who I am. I know am able to do what  I put my mind to.  Powerful!

I want to encourage you to take a time out to find clarity. If you have been feeling lost, empty, and trying things but you are still not satisfied. You need to do this!  Take time to think, evaluate and renew.  You are worth it!

I am still here!

Hey Ladies.

I have been away working a couple of projects.

I have not forgotten about you.  Stay tuned!

 

 

 

Uniquely Me

I think my whole life I been doing for other people.  As far as I can remember I have had this big desire to help people.  Actually, I help people to my detriment.  I take on other people’s problems and map them out until I find a solution.  Then, I help them until they succeed. The after math has been crazy.  I always wondered why people go on to live these happy lives and never pay back the sentiment.  Why, cause I put too much into them and nothing into me.  Or I would encourage the whole world (it felt like) and no one ever encouraged me.  I would be so hurt.  So, disappointed.  The Kicker would be when I got into relationships with men.  I would be like the best girlfriend encouraging and supportive. But never get the same back.  Then, they go off with the next chick and she benefits from all my hard work.  I was too done. 

I felt like everyone around me was gifted and talented. Other people had so much to give and I had nothing. I could see everyone living in purpose but I never saw it in myself.  I guess that is why I gave so much to everyone else.  At the same, I felt like the things inside of me were so little and dumb. 

I had to realize a few things about me.  Well, I am a natural born encourager or exhorter.  I can’t help myself even if I tried.  Words just flow out me like water.  I had to realize that God will always put me in the path of people in need.  How far I take is on me.  (Which, I guess I could have taken it too far I in the past.)  I love serving people.  I love doing big things little things anything to help.  It just happens.  I speak truth.  Lord, knows that has gotten me in trouble.  I am not saying I have never lied but I don’t like dishonesty.  I actually have to be truthful I freak out when I don’t.  I have learned to control how I say things but if you don’t want the truth don’t ask me. I see things other people don’t.  I will notice the minutest detail or I will give ideas and thoughts in details no one can understand but me.  (My kids hate this.) That is probably why I ask a lot of questions. I have tried to stop myself but I can’t.  I guess that is the strategic planner in me.   I love to research all kinds of stuff.  Trust me when I say I know all kinds of information and I know it is not all for my use.  I love to network, in person or virtually via Twitter of course.  My interest is peaked and I try to make connections with each person I meet.  I guess that is why I know so many people.  I am creative. I can almost never do anything totally by the book without adding my own flare.  From cooking to writing to my everyday life I am always creating something new. 

With all that being said, it has become almost imperative that I accept me.  I have to finally just live and be me.  I guess my whole life in some ways I have been running away from all the things that are uniquely me.  I guess my whole life I was doing all the things God created me to do.  In 2013, I am not going to kill myself trying to prove that I am good enough.  I am not going to push to fit in a mold that will never fit.  I understand now that I love helping people find purpose.  All those things that I have in me help others find purpose.

With a new outlook on life I am able to be ok with being me.  And move forward. I am able to help people and  with no expectation. I am totally confortable with who God created me to be. 

Wordless Wednesday!

8 Tips To Romance Your Man!

Valentine’s Day is coming and I think it is soooo important for Woman to make sure they keep the romance alive in their marriage or relationship.  I am not married (boo) and have never been married so I have to live vicariously through my married friends.  I am not in a relationship and not planning on having sex until I am married.  So, romance is kind of of out of the question, for now.  (We will replace romance for the word sex, keeping it clean.) Anyway! I know many of my friends talk about, “After you are married for while the romance is out the door.” I sit there in shock every time.  What no romance?  What in the world?

It is so beyond me that married people say we don’t have time or we are too tired for roamance. Come on people.  How are you supposed to keep that special Godly Bond going?  I think as a woman you should never withhold sex from your husband or ignore his need to connect with you.  The reason being is if you don’t then someone else will.  It's simple as that!  Men need to feel special and loved just like you do.  Never forget that.  I think it's time to stop being selfish ladies and romance your man.

It is quite simple.  The little things for men work so easily.  Just try these things and see...you'll be giddy as teenage girl at a Justin Bieber concert, when you are around your husband.

 

1.      When he gets home from work give him some space.  Let him regroup for about 30 minutes to an hour.  Men need to process and unwind. When he has time to do that he will be more willing to help you out.

2.      Cook him his favorite meal.  The old saying is, “The best way to win a man’s heart is through his stomach.” It is so true. If you don’t know how to boil water you should make sure you can at least cook his favorite meal. If nothing else.

3.      Stop looking like a whodunit and why around the house.  Make sure you look good from time to time.  I see so many women that get married and then they go to pots.  Men are visual! Men are visual!  When he likes what he sees romance is a done deal. 

4.      Do activities he likes. If he likes going to football games then get your gear on and go.  Or have a viewing party for him and his friends. If, he like fishing then dang it go fishing.  Unless, this is his personal time to unwind otherwise give him that time away without complaining.

5.      Take him on a date.  Change places.  Or should I say Trading Places (Usher).  Make all the plans. Pay for everything, even drive. Take him where he likes to go. Make sure you are looking fabulous and smelling good.  Remember, how good he used to look when you were dating? You know how you used be think, "He looks so good." Make him think the same thing about you.

6.      When he gets home from work (san kids) do everything for him.  Greet him at the door with a kiss.  Take his shoes off and rub his feet. No talking please! Have his dinner cooked (hot and ready).  Then, run him a hot bath.  Then, give him a bath.  Dry him off and then message his back.  If he don’t feel appreciated that...then I don’t know what to tell you. 

7.      Try kissing him everyday day for at least 30 days.  Not a peck on the cheek. I mean a kiss on the lips for at least 30 seconds.  I read this somewhere.  When you kiss like that you are making a real.  It might be awkward at first but after a few days it will become more passionate. 

8.      Ok, this one last one takes real commitment.  For 30 day…have sex.  You’re married so it should not be a big deal.  Your husband has testosterone surging all thru his body.  He may say, “Oh, baby it is ok that you’re not in the mood.” But what he is thinking…”Dang, It is not okay that for the millionth time we are not having sex. I feel like falling off a cliff.”  When you withhold sex you pushing him closer to finding somewhere else.

Ladies, I know some of these ideas might be a little much and you feel like you don’t have enough time in the day.  It could be that the kids are holding you back.  Honey, don’t even think like that or you will find another excuse to keep you from connecting to your Husband.  Even, the best of men will seek attention from another woman when they don’t what they need at home.  I am not saying he will cheat.  I am saying you don’t even want him to go there.  Or think about it. There are a lot of women out there happy to break up your home.  I suggest you don’t even them a chance.  Oh, and don’t think that no other woman would be interested in him. That will be your last married mistake.  He could be blind crippled and crazy as a loon I guarantee that some hoochie is looking at him like...She is like Sylvester smacking his lips when he sees innocent Tweety Bird. Trust Me!

It is nothing wrong with spoiling your man.  You want him do to all those things for you. Why not give him the same time and attention?

Photo by idiva.com

The Past Is The Past

Let the past be the past. How many times have you heard that? I know it is hard to forget the crazy things. Or even forget the good things. The past can keep you from moving forward. When we live in our past sadness, joys, and successes we tend to stay there.

Take for example, if you had a bad relationship you keep thinking that every person you meet after that is the same. Perhaps, you had great success and you keep going over and over how great it is was. You will never strive to make anything else happen. Whether, it is drama or success in your past it is still the past.


Stop, playing that movie over and over in your head. Make new things happen. That person that hurt you in the past is a jerk. Make sure you took the lesson and keep yourself from getting back in that situation again. Learn from your past success how to create another in the future. 


I have spent too much time thinking about the past. I had to let go. Regardless, of what happened in the past life doesn't stop. Life keeps going on around you. That jerk is probably not even thinking about you. That success might have been the first but not the last. Life is full of joy and sadness to help you become who you are.

When you get stuck in the past it stops you from living. You become stagnant and life begins to stink,  like when a pond becomes stagnant. I know you don't want your life to stink. So, SNAP OUT OF IT! LIVE FOR THE PRESENT!

 
Photo from favim.com

Wordless Wednesday

I saw this the other day.  It made me think of God's promise to me and how it was about to happen for me.

And Jason Wu Takes The Prize, Again!!!!

Today, was a historical day for our country. 50 years after the Civil Rights Movement  and the 2nd Inauguration of the First Black President on Martin Luther King, Jrs' Holiday.  That was a lot.  It was a very meaningful day to so many people.  We often don't think about what  people went through in the past to get us to this day.  Many people lost their lives and were treated horrible.  We  often don't realize that most of us in this country today are not pure Anglo-Saxon Or European Blood.  So, in reality all those people were fighting for you, too.  A little something to think about.

The day was filled with all kinds of Pomp and Circumstance. Most people were really wondering what Michelle Obama would wear today.  Since, stepping on the scene she has become a Fashion Icon.  She even has a website all about her Fashion choices. She has set the trend and brought fame to lessor known Designers.  She has made Sasha and Malia young fashionistas, as well.


I watched everything that day.  I love all the historical value and all the information going all over the TV gets me all excited.  Almost as soon I flip on the TV. I hear reporters talking about what Mrs. Obama will wear. It's National News! In case, you did not hear I would queue you in.

For the public swearing in ceremony she choose to wear a gorgeous dress and coat by designer Thom Brown and belt by J. Crew. 

The biggest prize winner is Jason Wu once again.  In 2009, he designed her Ball Gown for Mrs. Obama's  First Inaugural Ball.  That one Fashion choice put Jason Wu on the map.  Now, he is practically a household name.  I wonder what this will do for his career?

Like the president said today no matter how you feel about him you have to admit Michelle has done an outstanding job.   It is so true!  She makes being the First Lady look so effortless and fun.  How many other First Lady's went on a National Talk show running an obstacle course, joking and having fun?  None. You might think it is unbecoming of a First Lady but I think it makes her look quite normal and very likable.  Either way you gotta say the woman has style.

Photo Scavenger Hunt

Today, I am trying my hand a photography.  Most great bloggers do their own photos.  In the same tradition, going to do the Same. I ahd to find a way to get better so I can run with the big dogs.  I decided to join Scavenger Hunt Sunday by Ramblings and Photos by Ashley Sisk.  It is really quite simple you stop by her site on Sundays. Ashley writes a post on people, places, or things to photogragh. Sunday is the day you link up.  Simple Right?  I strongly encourage you to check it out. 

And now for the reveal.


A Park. I choose water park in black and white with color accents.

Here is the other side of the park for BBQing. 

While walking into Wal-Mart I thought I could take a picture.

People watching at historical Union Station.

Finding Where You Are Suppose To Be

The life we live can be daunting. There are a lot of things that keep us busy. We never get a chance to figure out what we should be doing with our lives.  We kinda get thrown into things.  Why not take the time out to honestly figure what you should be doing? And do it.

I know you can't put your current life aside and then just go into a long introspective.  But you can take some "Me Time." More than an hour if you can, If not take an hour per day for at least week. That will help.  Aren't you tired of going through the motions?  Aren't you tired of watching TV and seeing other people live their dreams? 

More and more people each day are finding out who they are and what they want to do.  Why can't you be one of those people?  I definitely want to be one of those people.  I sit and watch TV and often find myself thinking, "What does this person have that I don't? A great idea."  I have great ideas everyday.  May be they have a platform to make things happen.  The more important thing is how did they get there?  I mean mentally. What is the difference in their mentality and mine? 

You know the difference between them and me?  Is their ability to make things happen. But first they had to know what they wanted to do. They knew what made them special. They never would have figured that out with taking time out to think what they should be doing. 

Taking that time out to find you and what you should be doing is not wrong. When you finally go for what is inside of you...you will be happier and more fulfilled. In 2013, I will step out into the new me. The Me God Planned for me. As I go along my journey I would love for you to take a journey of your own.  We can laugh and share.  I am making the move because I feel like I am worth the journey. Aren't you worth it?
 

Wordless Wednesday!

This is area seen all through Vanderbilt Children's Hospital.  The sign is saying if you are sick or think you are sick please don't visit today. 

We Take Advantage That We Have Healthy Children

I was taking a little time out to relax and chill.  So, I went exploring. Exploring is one of the nicest things I enjoy doing.  I love finding these little surprises tucked back off the unbeaten path.  I decided to to drive around looking for one area but ended up by Vanderbilt University.  I had driven all through that area several times before. This time I became intrigued.  I would always see the Vanderbilt Children's Hospital and always wanted to go in but I never did. I decided today would be the day.  As I was parking I realized...I, and so many others, take advantage that I have healthy children.

I never really thought about it much except when two of my friends had sick babies at birth.  I prayed for them and worried with them but I never went to visit just because in that time people need to focus their energy on their sick child. As I walked to the entrance I thought about how many people have critically sick children.  Then, as I get on the elevator I saw a lady with a small baby pushing a an I.V. unit.  My heart went out to her and I gave a word of blessing. 

I walked around and took picture.  I kept thinking about how many people come through those very same areas every day worried and frantic about their children.  What do you say to those people?  Even, the best words of encouragement can't keep them from the pain they are feeling inside.  A parents love is so strong it breaks so many boundaries, even the worst parents feel that kind of love.  So, when you have sick child  and you don't know if they will be ok you can only imagine the anguish.  You don't want to leave the room or let alone leave the hospital not even to shower.  How do you comfort them?

I thought what can I do? What can I possibly do?  I decided to go to the information station and find out about volunteering.  Of course, they were closed. Then, I decided to see what the NICU lobby area looked like. Approached a receptionist. I asked if they had volunteers in the NICU and she said, "Yes, they call them cuddlers," with excitement.  A cuddler.  I cuddle babies.  I could cuddle tiny little babies.  The thought scared me.  I realized that I need to pray about my direction and where to start.  I got back on the elevator with a couple.  The husband looked more relaxed then the Mom. She looked like she was about to break out crying at any moment.  I asked, "How are you doing?" The mother responded, "Tired."  I said, "How old is your baby?" The father responded, "3 days old."  I said "I know your baby will be fine. I'll be praying for you," as we exited the elevator and they thanked me and walked over to the food court. 

 

Most of us live our life happy that we can see our children laugh and play. From time to time our children become sick and we spend a few sleepless nights to care for them.  But, do you know there are people out there that have never seen their child play they just hope that one day they can take them home.  Think about it we get so annoyed that we have shlep our kids to dance, baseball, and football but some of those parents spend most of their days in hospital room.  It is sad but it is reality for some parents.

I have no idea if I will volunteer but I do know that I will add parents of sick chilren to my prayer list.  I also know, that when I am yelling at my kids for something small and mundane there are some people that can't.   

 

 

 

Coupons and More Coupons!

Stretch Your Gift Cards! Part 2

Ikea

Wordless Wednesday! How To Stretch Those Gift Cards

I came with a good way to stretch those gift cards.  Use some coupons.  Coupons and discounts are the best way to make those gift cards to the max.  Here are few to help you out.